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cantiaohai aka mini_ds

ME GOH JIA YI GOT PROMOTED TO FIRST SERGEANT!!!!!!!
this is like even better than my dreams!!!!!
can literally hug my rank to sleep.
so afraid that i won't be promoted!!!
I AM SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!
I can jump jump and jump arnd with happiness!!!!!!!
ITS A GREAT GREAT HAPPY HAPPY DAY!!!!!!!!!
today have house meeting and it was sorta terrible!!!
My housemaster is my form teacher and got sirs and mams in it too!!!
ARGH!!! whole of 4i got in competitive run AGAIN!
ok, i plead and beg and whine, but haiz, no use!
THEN, sir called the whole nc company down.
i thought that i go competitve le so dunid lo.
budden kena spotted by juniors and saboed!!!!!
ARGH!!!!!!!
so i am in both competitve and cheering!!!
argh!!!!!! sir and mr teo shld help me mah.
but i guess not.
kinda look forward to the trip tmr.
sitting on the bus is nice.

寻找梦想 8:22 PM

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Exams are like juz 2 weeks away and i still feel super sian.
Yes, i am very worried and tensed.
But i juz dun have the motivation anymore after so many blows.
Am i dumb or wad?
Why did everyone managed to score and yet
i am still left on the same spot?
I dun understand at all. I SUCK!
I somehow dunwan myself to go through all those torture again.

寻找梦想 8:13 PM

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tired.
all i can say that is i am very tired
with all the work and worries and frustration that has been pulling me down.
I am stressed and sick and tired.
There is just so much to do and there is simply not enough time.
online also not to play.
ohwells, i think i will be dying.

purple light at the warfront, this is where my buddy dies,
if i die, will you bury me?
with my rifle and buddy and me~

寻找梦想 6:27 PM

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I am like very pissed.
But i also dunwanna fret over you!
Pleease, please get out of my life.
I hate the tone you talk to moi!
I hate the tone you talk to mum.
Even in your opinion, you are concerned, but can you show us your concern in a more normal way? Normal as in not yelling. Definitely.
If you dunno, we are humans that have feelings.
Please, respect us a little more.
Not becoz you are a father and a husband then you ought to be respected and can trampled us under your stinky freaking legs!
For gods sake, i am now desperately finding reasons to look at you, and
to talk to you nicely, because the reason that states that plainly you are my dad
is gradually losing its stand.
Becoz, i dun see in anyway you are doing a great job.
Yes, you are my dad.
thats the ugly truth that i cannot deny.
Unfortunately.
pple may think that i am rude and stuff, sorry but you are not im my position.
Facing a useless, incompetent, unreasonable, and rude to you dad, i dun
cannot open my mouth to address him.
I dunno since when that happen, maybe since he takes me as a scapegoat for everything.
When i was young, fine.
I can't stand up for myself, but now sorry, i can.
I won't stand you maligning me abt things that you didn't see
and jumped to conclusions and even if you know clearly that you did it.
I can't stand you not apologizing when the whole world knows you are in the wrong
and you juz conveniently accused me.
For gods sake, its juz bread crumbs!!!!!!!!
And at least use your freaking ass to think.
I juz got home and i didn't eat bread!!!!!
Where did the bread come from? Obviously!
So stop saying its me!!!!!!!!!!!
STOP YOUR RIDICULOUS CRAP!!!!!

寻找梦想 8:17 PM

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lol
today do pt in no4 and yes its tiring.
but k la, i still can do somemore and its not the hiongest.
see the cadets doing their best and enduring all the way,
seriously i feel proud of them. budden ya its sad.
i nearly cried with them.
but it is smth that they really have to face and brave through tgth.
as time passes by, i am getting more worried for my results
and its gonna be the time for us to step down.
i won't even mind going back to the days when i was recruit.
it all seem so fast,
i am not prepared. so not prepared for it.
i think i wil cry like amd.
Juz like a piece of my flesh has been torn from me.
that hurts.
i feel so tired nowadays,
wanna slp but can't.
ohwells, ytd was my dad bdae.
didn't know wad to do btw.
haiz, lets not talk abt the unhappy stuff
and lets just study hard.

寻找梦想 8:31 PM

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Well, today is a slightly free-er day.
2 teachers nv come and we kinda slack.
Well, there is this listing game we played and hello!
I lost to a girl!!!!!!!
God and the dare is to sing a song.
ohwells, i am sooo not going to sing high.
Let them have a taste of my low low voice. hia hia hia.
Evil huh?
Alrighto, i am hoping to catch up on all the work and revise a bit i guess.
But i dunno. time isn't cooperating.
And i hope my brain juice dun run out.
Well, me as usual being lame and CORNY!!!!
haha.
CID was absolutely awesome!!!!!
Did a presentation abt our grp progress. (me talking only!!!!)
then i felt sooooooooooooo proud. we were the promising group.
I am sooooo proud of all of us!!!!!!
We were committed and this is the first time
i felt so attached to a project.
But of course there are obstacles in front of us.
Right in front somemore.
ok, we will solve it.
WE ARE SUPERB!!!!!!!!
p.s. somehow.

寻找梦想 6:08 PM

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Today got physics test and i think i died,
next is Napfa test and i think i died physically.
PAIN!!!!!! ACHING ALL OVER!!!!!!!!
Although i get gold la haha.
Then, cca. somehow i got a little pissed.
Pissed at how they take the platoon. Pissed at what they did.
So i screamed a little, well, actually a lot.
I din mean to scream though, didn't know what came over me.
A moment, i was spilling with happiness from Napfa, the other
moment was simply just fuming with anger.
After that i got the feeling that i was being hated.
Seriously, if i were them, i will hate me.
But it felt bad. Fancy someone hating you.
Ohwells, if it can help them, i can sacrifice myself.
Noble huh? hehe.
well, a bit bored, but finally i am breathing.
Breahing from the huge amount of stress and homework.
Had a talk with a couple of my friends and i realised that
i am very selfish indeed. That makes me feel bad.
I am guilty and i dunno what to do.
I felt that i am too mean to them and i am a bitch. ohgod, did i juz call myself that?
ok, that hurts. so i guess show them more concern now?
Wish i could.

寻找梦想 8:26 PM

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