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cantiaohai aka mini_ds

Yesterday's print flow was crazy.
This morning's too.
I was juggling 400 pieces of paper in one and a half hour!
Drowned by tsunami >.<
Made my blues kinda worsen.

Watched season finale of skins season 1 last night.
And it was lame -.-
I mean, Cassie and Sid are sweet. Yes, I know.
And it's good to see that Tony has changed and realised that he does love Michelle.
And seeing Maxxie makes me melt, literally.
But car crash?
And singing after that?
Like obvious lip sync some more?
Like hello? No depth!
Makes me wonder why I am watching the drama.
Oh yes, for amusement. And yes, the hot guys.
I will start on season 2 soon, because there will be more Maxxie!<3

Oh and I dreamt of Tony on sunday night. HAHA
The dream goes like this:
Tony and I were in some cafe, standing there.
And this girl walked past me and brushed past my butt.
So, I was kinda pissed off.
And Tony encouraged me to go beat the girl up.
Lols and I did.
So I went over to her table, put my hands on my hips and screamed:
"You *ucking whore!"
(I am not so crude k? My subconcious brings in the context of the drama, that's why.)
And attempted to hit her. But she caught my hands and I ended up flailing my arms around. ROFLMAO!~
It was funny when I recounted it, but at that moment, I totally felt shameful.
Then Tony grabbed me and ran, with that girl chasing after us.
We ran to the supposed college and lock the doors and we began strolling down the classrooms.
And I dunno for what reason, we squatted down beside some wall, and all of a sudden Tony was sobbing into me, telling me that he love michelle.
LOLS and I patted him on the head going: I know, I know.
HAHA and I woke up.
Well, at least I dreamt of the hot guy and not the geek :D

Oh. And I went down to Orchard Central for the DJ audition.
But didn't register in the end because woah, there are tons of people there!
I mean, since when did DJ become a popular profession?
Well, the queues turn me off quite a lot.
And the egoistic and shameless guy that went on stage turned me off even more.
Goodness, he went up claiming that he can sing like Adam Lambert.
God, no. What the hell, no.
A kid can sing better than him.
Seriously, the DJs are too kind to fuel his ego.
I would have slap his ego down to hell.
Goodness me, have some pride.
Don't make yourself a laughing stock.
Why make yourself out to be a joke?
And people didn't laugh because of what you said, they laughed at you.
Hmm, so I was rather disgusted and I went away.
Well, chances come and go.
If it's meant for me, I believe it will come again then.

Taiwan trip? Hokgkong trip?
But Singapore has a lot of cheap and pretty clothes, no?
Go overseas to stock up on college wear sounds a little ridiculous.
Since I've been there before and the air fare is not exactly cheap.
Resign?
Should I?
Crap, why is life filled with decisions that I don't want to make?

Today is the last day.
I shall go stare at that page.
And close my eyes and the browser.
And tell myself that once I have chosen, there will be no more regrets.

寻找梦想 3:42 PM

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First time running after 6 months.
And I can't believe it.
It felt SO GOOD!
The rush of the air and the adrenaline pumping through me.
I feel... healthier lols.
But I AM SUPER SLOW.
I ran about 1km in about 10 minutes?!
Like hello~ That's 100m/min! Goodness >.<
I used to be able to run what... 160m/min.
That's like 60m/min gone with the 6 months T.T
Sighs, so now, I shall aim to hit 200m/min yea:D
Dapao dinner and had the house to myself as dad was OT-ing and mum went out with her colleagues.
It was not bad I guess. Just lying there on the couch for 3 hours.
Watching TV and laughing aloud.
(with no one nagging :p)

Ho! Lunch was good too!
Went out with one of my colleauge and we spent a long long time deciding what are we going to eat.
Ended up in some cosy restaurant instead.
The ambience is good, food is not bad too! (Y)
But the black pepper chicken seemed to be too strong for my throat...
Coughed myself awake this morning OHNOS!
Price is reasonable too.
And so, I realised that peeling away the tradition coat of armour that chinatown has been placed upon, when we explore deeper into the streets...
There are actually quite a number of cute shops, cool-looking pubs, and cosy restaurants with reasonable prices!
This should be the form chinatown takes on man!

寻找梦想 9:50 AM

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Went back to RV to collect our A level certificates yesterday.
Woke up at 9am but I dread going out of the house.
I wanna rot at home...
Sighs, looking at RV again makes me miss studying even more.
Yes, I know that I am going back to school this coming August.
To study what I like.
But, I guess, the feeling is just different.
To wear uniform and sit in a classroom, while listening to the teachers droning on and on...
Though the situations may be similar, but to me, the feeling will be gone.
It's just not the same anymore.
I still remembered when I was in secondary school...
And I kept thinking about how far I had to go before university.
Seriously, actually, it's not that far after all.
Saw a number of teachers in the General Office.
Saw Mr Ho! And Mrs Tan! And Mr Teo!
Told Mr Ho and Mr Teo my choice but they didn't have much of a response.
Haha Mr Teo said we can crash his house someday.
Hmm, wonder whether he will remember what he said.
Ahwells... We went to roam around the school for a little bit.
But yea, the more I roam, the more I miss RV.
Incredible yea? I find it unbelievable too.
But once before, we were able to walk wherever we like.
But now, we roam the school in our home clothes, exclaiming about the differences.
Sighs... I wanna go back! >.<

Ho! We went to Jurong Point to eat Swensens and I splurge on sirloin steak! :D
With sticky chewy chocolate sundae! (Y)
Then we went to watch Pirates of the Carribean!
Quite nice~~
But I kinda miss Orlando Bloom's appearance...
And we missed the post credits scene T.T
Went to Carl's Junior to have dinner.
Shared chicken salad with huiyuan because the steak still remained in my stomach :p
Fun day!~ (Brings back a lot of unwaken memories)

寻找梦想 11:44 AM

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Dread work.
I don't like to wake up in the morning.
Sighs...

Wanted to rot at home yesterday and watch Kung fu Panda!
But my mum dragged me to my grandma's house.
But, good thing that I went:D
I went to Toa Payoh to buy Famous Amos' chocolate chip macadamia cookies!
It's awesome!~
And! When I was on the bus going towards my grandma's house,
there is this rather cute and cool looking 10-year-old boy who keeps staring at me.
So, I smiled at him, and he smiled back!
And throughout the trip, he just kept staring at me and smiling while playing with his toy car or something.
Then, I got to alight.
After I alighted, he looked out the window at me.
So, I waved. And he waved back!
Cool huh?
I think he is hun xie too! Like maybe mix singaporean and brazilian that type!
Woah! Amazing!~~~


Ok, so now I know that we like the same thing.
Common topic, check.
But I have no idea why we gave the conversation up halfway.
Well, I didn't exactly invite him for more.
And he didn't continue either.
I just think it's a pity.
That we have grown apart and that we are unable to move the awkwardness away.
Or perhaps, we just don't dare to try.
Or maybe he thinks that it's somehow pointless.
And in some way, unfortunately, I have to agree.
Sometimes, some people are just meant to be missed.

寻找梦想 9:27 AM

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This week was rather uneventful.
Rotting at home on tuesday make me cherish the time more.

But still, yes. No inspiration.
I love clementi library! I went yesterday and today.
New books ftw!
So pretty! Makes me wanna own them!
It's convenient but not somewhere where I wanna sit and read.
Too open. And too crowded. Hmm, I feel.

Took leave today to go to NUS environmental studies talk and reception.
Hmm, I went alone and reached really early.
So I went around to explore for quite a bit.
FASS is so near my house! Though is on the other side of NUH, but still, it's still 15 minutes away!
Sighs, but the recption is not very impressive, though the goodie bag is (Y)
But of course, all of these are not good enough reasons to influence my decision.
Just that I feel a little neither here nor there though the curriculum is attractive.
So I shall make my final decision tomorrow.
Somehow, the thought itself scares me.
Ugh.
Why is this so difficult for me when everyone says my anwser is obvious.
Gah.
Wah.
Crazy. I am going crazy.

Bought a pretty dress and a black jacket and a green tank top and a beautiful brown three way bag and a cute tinkerbell necklace!
So happy with my treasure today!~

DJ?
English? Chinese?

Is there anything available to chase away headaches and dilemma?

寻找梦想 10:23 PM

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Yesterday was great, in a way. Despite the fact that it is friday the 13th.
Well, I didn't trip this time round.
But the system hangs on me.
And the customer with the largest order decided to submit at this time period.
So the system is like dying, with me along.
My timing was totally delayed as the network is totally not responding.
And I practically chiong-ed afterwards.
Ahwells, on the bright side, I ate yong tau foo laksa for lunch (y)
And me and my colleagues went to Central @ Clarke Quay for brief shopping.
I bought sticky!~
(10 bucks though:/)
And one of my colleagues spotted a pair of shoes that she really liked.
So she totally asked me to pei her and buy on sat afternoon coz she is meeting her friend for dinner.
Hmm, but guess what?
We went after we knocked off instead coz her friend couldn't make it for dinner.
Woah. She didn't buy that pair, instead she bought 2 pairs from Elizabeth Litz, a local brand that is relatively new and have classy and pretty shoes.
But the price... woah, totally out of my range.
And then I began to see the difference.
I see the benefits of coming out to work full time.
Money, a lot of money.
She bought 2 pairs as the shop was having a promotion of buy 2 @ $138.
And to her, the price is acceptable.
I look forward to that day, when I will be able to do just that:D
Shopping with her, was rather comfortable.
Though I didn't buy anything but our styles are somewhat similar.
So we have quite a lot to gush about...
Dinner at Ajisen was great too! We talked a lot and I really enjoyed her company.
All in all, shopping and dinner dates with colleagues turn out to be rather pleasurable as well:D
Just that, this gave me more reasons to miss them after I leave.
Leaving, used to be so easy...

Sighs, oh. And I stayed up to watch Galileo, with haiwei. In a way.
Haha we texted throughout so it feels like we are watching together:D
It's great!
The guy is a genius! But it's physics...
Something that I will never be able to comprehend fully LOLS

寻找梦想 10:10 AM

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Today...
Small interuptions made the happiness a little incomplete.
Printer's ink went keesiao.
Korean food (kimichi soup) for lunch...
Colleagues O.O as I sweat like mad and turned pink literally!
Lols, that's how I am when I eat spicy stuff.
Err, now they know lols.
And seriously, the thing is not even very spicy.
I am a sucker at this :/

Have been looking forward to tonight ever since we settled on the date.
Long John for dinner but didn't manage to have awfully chocolate in the end:/
NEXT TIME! :D
Water for elephants is great!
I think the plot is good. Robert Pattinson is hot in rags LOLS
But true enough, he doesn't really have that kind of passion with Resse Witherspoon.
I mean, I could do with a little more wild scenes.
It will make the FEELING more realistic.
Like "yea, we are desperate. our lifes are hanging by threads here."
Oh and that, quoting Jennie, schizophrenic bastard acts kinda well.
Coz it makes me hate him!
But I love Rosie, the elephant! She's cute!
I love the part when she took out her chain and walked over to have some lemonade like nobody's business! (Y)
And "life is full of tricks and delusions."
Sometimes, talent cannot be guaranteed by certificates and degrees.
But by the talent found within you.

I should totally hang out more with girlfriends.
Then I can be me. I can be natural.
You can be a bitch or a good girl anywhere,
but you will always be you around me.

Transferred the money for lion king's ticket.
Did I mention that I am going to watch lion king? XD
Like "YES FINALLY!"
Can't wait at all! Anticipating~
I was thinking of wearing my prom dress there~ :D
And there are more dates coming right up!
And it's time to scout for more flexible and enjoyable jobs.

寻找梦想 10:38 PM

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It's great to be able to wake up on a late saturday morning.
I sacrifice too much.
How long have I been not doing that?
Yup, three and a half months.
It's a blessing to be able to wake up at 11am on a saturday and watching spongebob while having my breakfast. (Y)
Usually, my saturdays only start at 5pm due to work.
It's fantastic to be able to start today at 11am:D
And I watched Message in a Bottle.
It'a amazing that I didn't cry, since my tears went free fall when I was reading the book.
They were quite subtle in the movie about the grieving parts.

But somehow, I dunno how, but somehow this show aid me in my choice in university admission as well.
I begin to question myself: Where do I belong? What is my true north?
To be able to enter the prestigious, number 1 university in singapore and come out to work in a specialised arena, earning big bucks...
Or to enjoy what I am going to learn and not dread work for the rest of my life and still earn enough.
Perhaps, this way I wouldn't be top-notch and exceptionally specialised.
Perhaps, this way I wouldn't be a millionaire by 50 but I believe I can earn enough to manage my finances and on top of that, be happy.
To many, the answer to my question may be obvious.
But they didn't know how that prestige blinded me.
I was what, 1 of the 50?
I managed to squeeze into that competitive spot and I am going to turn it all down?!
For what?
I can be one of the most significant and impactful people in the world.
Out there, making a difference.
But what difference would it make if I will always hold one small regret in my heart.
Will I be truly happy, knowing that I have let my dream slipped away?
To me, this decision is important.
Because I am choosing a life here.
To me, there wouldn't be a bend in the road to turn me out of this.
I wasn't able to see it then.
But I am seeing it now.
I can foresee myself, in that near future.
Learning and doing what I love.
And relief swamped over me when I finally acknowledged the decision deep within.
And now I know.
I can have a lot of interests.
But I have to recognize my one true passion.
And when I did, I know where my true north is.

寻找梦想 12:16 PM

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Having a migraine now, which I dunno why.
Since I totally just rot at home today.
I realised that I am a really bad fan.
I don't have over 30 songs that Jesse sang.
Screw me. So I spent my entire morning downloading all the songs:D
And spent the rest of my afternoon watching Keith, the 2008 movie that Jesse starred in.
The plot is pretty simple and for a lot of people, it's rather slow.
But I think the fliming was done pretty well.
Amazingly, I didn't cry at all even though Jesse died in the end.
But then they did it rather subtly.
And i think the ending was really well done.
Hmm, but I have to admit, a lot of the times I was just staring at Jesse McCartney.
Just staring and swooning~
Btw, the show doesn't include subtitles, so once I start staring at him, I tuned out and miss their conversations.
But expected huh?
He is so hot in there! Er, he is hot everywhere!
But mysterious boys have that tinge of appeal!
Recently, I posted a number of Jesse's videos on facebook wall so that everytime I log onto facebook, I can watch them again and again and again!
Great day holiday!~

寻找梦想 8:15 PM

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