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cantiaohai aka mini_ds

Desaru on saturday!
Which is my 18th BIG DAY!~~
Took me a little while to decide whether to go.
Prelim is on its way >_<
But horoscope says that I will have a better mood if I go out and relax during my holidays.
So 贴切 right?
Haha, qianhui gave me the present already! SO FAST!
I love it, thank loads:D
Saw the salvation army sent a happy birthday email to me.
Am a little touched.
I hope this birthday will be as fabulous as the last<3!

寻找梦想 2:30 PM

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左右为难。
为什么简简单单的事情总要变得很复杂。
好害怕事情的开始，更害怕事情的结束。
想念。空虚。
我。。。就是一个那么没有安全感的女生。
明明你就在我的身边，明明大家都看得很清。
唯独我，不愿去相信。
有时候的你，虽站在我身边，却让我感受不到你的存在。
好似我们之间的距离好遥远。
我知道，是我多疑了。是我的不安感在作祟。
你。。。是个好人。
我。。。很努力地把心底的小恶魔藏起来。
不让它出来捣蛋。因为，他/我只想把你霸占。

有人问我，那么你心里的天使呢？
我回答：就是他。

有时候想要故弄玄虚，无中生有。
只有自己明白自己的心思。
在别人眼里，好像很不符合逻辑。
那么，十年后呢，在我读这则 entry 时，我会记得当初心里的悸动吗？
了解我在说什么吗？
领悟到我在指的人并非只有一个，也有男有女。
可是这一次，我不想说明。
就让不明白的，继续不明白下去。

白痴/疯子 也可以有很感人的初恋。
很不真实。没人相信。
但是，初恋的感觉，像刚拔好的鲜橙，酸甜酸甜的。
你的名字，你的面容，唯有我不会忘记。
你是我心目中一辈子的天使/王子。

寻找梦想 6:15 PM

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Saw my primary 4 photo on facebook.
Oh my goodness~ It is like 8 years ago!
And I am sorry to say that I don't recognise most of them.
And some I don't even know that they are in my class, till I saw them in the photo.
Is my memory that bad?
I know tons of people will yell YES, but well, ya...
Woah, and that made me think of the past.
It really did seem so long ago.

I am just...tired.

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY ANNA!~~~

寻找梦想 7:49 PM

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If you want us to mug, you should stop spamming us with lessons!
I am so overwhelmed, that i find no time at all!
Not that I am complaining about extra lessons,
they do help me clarify my doubts and allow me to revise some of my concepts.
But I have been seriously neglecting my geography and economics.
Not that I have been focusing on my chemisty and mathematics.
Oh goodness.
I am just so sick and tired of the routine that I am falling into.
I wake up, feeling stressed.
I go to bed, wanting to cry.
I can't even dream those carefree dreams anymore.
Perhaps I have been incepted, no?
Everyday is a torture for me as I watched the dates fly past.
Teachers stressing, parents stressing, and now what? Peers too?
Jolly good, ain't it?
I stare at the calender blankly sometimes, looking at all the days gone,
my mind equally blank.
I dread every morning, I dread every night.
I look at my work and I want to cry.
But I've locked all those negative emotions away.
Somewhere deep, somewhere secret.
Locking the truth that I once knew, and chose to forget.
How I wished that someone would so kindly come up and tell me,
that the world I am living in is not real.
And that death is the only way out.
The only escape.
Then I will gladly wait for the train that is going to take me far away.
I hope I know where the train is going to take me.
But yes, I don't know for sure.
And yes, it doesn't matter.
Because I will be free.
And then i can hope for every paradox to occur.
And someone to take me by the hand, and to show me that I can.
And that there are no boundaries, if I believe.
So, here I am still holding on.
To that one tiny ray of hope.
And wait for someone to believe in me, when even I have lost faith in myself.

寻找梦想 8:07 PM

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收到一则短信，觉得很 sweet!~~
尤其是：
你成了我的朋友就成了我永远的牵挂。。。
其实朋友就是这样，从来无需想起，因为不曾忘记！

朋友就是希望彼此幸福。
心一辈子都是向着他们的。
还有，从以前我就一直坚信着，没有任何一种记忆会被遗忘，只是放到了内心深处罢了。
说我傻也好，说我白痴也好，别人不信的，怀疑的，我统统都信。
单纯的相信有永远，有一辈子。
但是，为了这，我愿意变傻，变笨。
就因为我知道我心里最重要的人们会一直陪着我。
或许以后因为种种原因他们的人不再我的身边了，不能理所当然的靠着他们了，
我也不会怀疑，因为我知道他们的心和我的心紧紧相扣着。
我们坐在炉灶前修炼的友情，比钢铁还要坚硬！

哇！那封短信还真是煽情。
马上能勾出我心里那么多的情感。
还有，短信里还提到七夕哦！虽然我们从来都没有庆祝。。。
但是不知道怎么了，这次特别感慨。
可能因为也特别委屈吧。。。
总之，先恭祝大家七夕快乐！
还有，我会一直等你们把短信传回给我的！一直等！

我常常会问的问题。。。这次我想知道答案。
你相信我吗？:D

寻找梦想 5:56 PM

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有时候，承诺不需要说出口。

Rebecca: I thought she was your girlfriend.
Luke: No. She’s not my girlfriend. She’s not you.

I like shopping. Is there anything so wrong with that? Stores are put there to enjoy. The experience is enjoyable. Well, more than enjoyable. It’s beautiful. The rush you feel when you swipe your card. And it’s approved. And it all belongs to you! The joy you feel when you’ve bought something, and it’s just you and the shopping. All you have to do is hand over a little card. Isn’t that the best feeling in the world? Don’t you just wanna shout it from the mountaintops? And you feel so confident and alive and happy and warm.
~Rebecca
Confessions of a Shopaholic


I totally agree to that!! :D



Chihiro: Will we meet again sometime?
Haku: Sure we will.
Chihiro: Promise?
Haku: Promise. Now go, and don’t look back.

Once you’ve met someone, you never really forget them. It just takes a while for your memories to return.
~Zeneba
Spirited Away

Now my hero since I was 5!
The movie is like 57 years old le! But he is still my hero! <3






Rose: A woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets. But now you know there was a man named Jack Dawson and that he saved me, in every way that a person can be saved. I don’t even have a picture of him. He exists now… only in my memory.

Jack: You’re gonna get out of here, you’re gonna go on and make lots of babies, and you’re gonna watch them grow. You’re gonna die an old lady warm in her bed, but not here, not this night. Not like this, do you understand me? Winning that ticket, Rose, was the best thing that ever happened to me… it brought me to you. And I’m thankful for that, Rose. I’m thankful. You must do me this honor, Rose. Promise me you’ll survive. That you won’t give up, no matter what happens, no matter how hopeless. Promise me now, Rose, and never let go of that promise.
Rose: I promise.
Jack: Never let go.
Rose: I’ll never let go. I’ll never let go, Jack.





And here is my prince charming forever!
I know I will never see him like that again.
But like what Rose said, he will always be in my memories <3



Thanks to Jennie that i am now obsessed with the web!
Recommend all of you to go recollect your memories.
http://movieoftheday.tumblr.com/
It allows to be dream:D

寻找梦想 9:13 PM

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今天去了秘密基地！
好久没去了，但是那里的女服务生竟然认得我们耶！
那么，那么，我们也算是常客了吧！
太高兴，太兴奋了！
以后我们一定要常常去，店在，我们在哦！



很棒吧！
安娜的是芒果芝士蛋糕，而我的是提拉米苏！
配上浓浓的咖布奇诺，天堂嘛！~~~
呵呵，哎呀！安娜，我们忘了拍咖啡的照片了啦！
以后我们每一次去秘密基地，提醒我要拍照哦！
每一次都要作记录！~~~

寻找梦想 9:27 PM

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你知道吗？
在你身边的时候，我就好开心！
笑容会不自觉地跑到我的脸上来，我会习惯性地牵起你的手。
我想要以后的每一天都不和你分开。
我竟然能够看到我的未来，有你。

平时的我，除了头稍微大了一点，脸皮厚了一点。。。其实我还蛮不善于说肉麻话的。
但是，不知道为什么，今天特别感慨。
听到你在说别的男人的时候，我竟然有点吃醋的感觉。
你交男朋友时，我应该会时常在吃他的醋吧？
何况，你又有点重色轻友。。。
我应该会很不识相的插在你们中间吧。
到时的你，应该会狠心的把我赶走，不让我妨碍你们的私人空间对吧？
那么当你结婚的时候呢，履行诺言，当伴娘的我，会不会在你身后泣不成声，像嫁女儿似的呢？
那么我结婚的时候呢？你当我的伴娘时，也会落泪吗？
当我们的中间多了个男人。。。

我很自私吧。
我从来不知道自己也可以那么自私，也有那么强的占有欲。
其他的事，就没什么问题。
但是，就是你和我之间的事，我看得特别重。
是因为我从来没有遇过像你这样的知己吧。一辈子的。
我也没有怀疑过我在你心里面的分量，因为我知道我们真的是知己对吧？
但是，就是对小小的细节特别挑剔，计较。
有秘密也不想隐瞒你。
你说，处女座的人很爱生闷气吧。。。
可是，你的闷气我却始终生不了。忍没多久就全盘托出了。

但是，我被鱼骨呛到时，为什么不是你第一时刻冲过来看我的状况呢？
为什么不是你过来拍拍我的背呢？
我还想了很多种答案，很多种理由来安慰自己。
我。。。很幼稚吧？ 很白痴吧？
呵呵，我也知道，也没怨你。
只是不知道为什么我在你的面前会变成这个样子。

因为太过于重要，所以很容易受伤吧。。。
因为太过于重要，所以很害怕失去吧。。。
所以才那么的没有安全感吧。。。
因为想要了解你的一切，想要认识你的家人，想要你生活里的每一个篇章都有我的存在，
所以才会做出种种奇怪，厚脸皮，又无理的要求吧。
我真的很自私耶！
不喜欢这样的自己，但却没办法控制。
你也会讨厌这样的我吗？

我想知道答案，却又害怕答案的结果。
你知道吗？我们其实很像 skip beat 里面的 kyouko 和 mouko 对吧？
就我在你身边鬼吼鬼叫，死缠不放。
你也会像 mokou 那样对吧？
然后，和她们一样，做永远的知己。
写了那么多，我只想告诉你。。。
这辈子我不会放手了，我想要一直呆在你的身边。
我们的下辈子，来生，我还想遇见你。
不知你是否会有同感。。。
不过，就请你包容我的缺点，我的任性，我的撒娇。
在今生，继续牵着我的手不要放开好吗？

寻找梦想 8:53 PM

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该是时候放手了。
It's about time.
He's a total different league from me.
为什么会喜欢他呢？
不应该，不可能的嘛！
只是一时糊涂了。。。一时糊涂而已。
所以，得把持住。压抑那一股心动。
把他赶出心里的每一个角落。
不能在沉沦了。
彻彻底底地放手好了。
不要再有那种感觉了！不可以！
我绝不再容许！
行的！

寻找梦想 7:46 PM

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I just want to be the one to protect you, that's all.
~~Tsuruga Ren

The only thing on my mind is your safety.

So long as my existence inside of her is bigger than anyone's.
~~Fuwa Shou

I can't believe it!
I seem to like Fuwa shou more and more!
NO!!!!
I should be liking REN! REN! REN! REN!
He loved her so much!
AHH!~~~

寻找梦想 12:22 PM

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